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Two and a Half Men
Two and a Half Men - Season 9
Two and a Half Men

Season 9

September 19, 2011

A new chapter begins when internet billionaire Walden Schmidt moves in, bringing fresh energy, wealth, and more absurd adventures to the Malibu household.

24 Episodes

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Episodes

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
E1 ★ 4.5

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

September 19, 2011

Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

People Who Love Peepholes
E2 ★ 5.0

People Who Love Peepholes

September 26, 2011

Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

Big Girls Don't Throw Food
E3 ★ 4.8

Big Girls Don't Throw Food

October 3, 2011

Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

Nine Magic Fingers
E4 ★ 4.4

Nine Magic Fingers

October 10, 2011

Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
E5 ★ 5.1

A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

October 17, 2011

Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

The Squat and Hover
E6 ★ 4.6

The Squat and Hover

October 24, 2011

Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
E7 ★ 5.1

Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

October 31, 2011

Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brother left him in his will.

Thank You for the Intercourse
E8 ★ 5.5

Thank You for the Intercourse

November 7, 2011

When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

Frodo's Headshots
E9 ★ 5.6

Frodo's Headshots

November 14, 2011

Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
E10 ★ 5.1

A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

November 21, 2011

Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

What a Lovely Landing Strip
E11 ★ 5.2

What a Lovely Landing Strip

December 5, 2011

Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

One False Move, Zimbabwe!
E12 ★ 4.8

One False Move, Zimbabwe!

December 12, 2011

Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him into a downward spiral.

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
E13 ★ 4.9

Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

January 2, 2012

Walden’s ex-wife and mother try to take control of his company, so he turns to Alan for help.

A Possum on Chemo
E14 ★ 5.3

A Possum on Chemo

January 16, 2012

Zoey tries to convince Walden to cut his hair and shave; Alan and Lyndsey revive their relationship.

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
E15 ★ 5.1

The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

February 6, 2012

Walden tries to loosen Zooey up by sharing some of Berta's special brownies.

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
E16 ★ 5.4

Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

February 13, 2012

Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on Valentine's Day.

Not in My Mouth!
E17 ★ 4.0

Not in My Mouth!

February 20, 2012

Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has a drinking problem.

The War Against Gingivitis
E18 ★ 4.7

The War Against Gingivitis

February 27, 2012

Walden's ex-business partner shows up at the beach house looking to make peace.

Palmdale, Ech
E19 ★ 4.6

Palmdale, Ech

March 19, 2012

Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers. Jake and Eldridge get a ride from Walden to a party.

Grandma's Pie
E20 ★ 4.3

Grandma's Pie

April 9, 2012

Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Alan and Lyndsey try to cope with their mom's relationship.

Mr. Hose Says "Yes"
E21 ★ 5.5

Mr. Hose Says "Yes"

April 16, 2012

Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargained for when he moves in with Lyndsey

Why We Gave Up Women
E22 ★ 5.8

Why We Gave Up Women

April 30, 2012

Charlie's ghost pays a visit to Alan after he suffers a minor heart attack.

The Straw in My Donut Hole
E23 ★ 4.9

The Straw in My Donut Hole

May 7, 2012

Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn’t so sure it’s deserved.

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
E24 ★ 5.3

Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

May 14, 2012

Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.